Love Thru Postcards

Lay here, never leave me my dear.

fast breathing, lips on my finger tips, and not missing any thing.

Never let me down, and now you are all i write about.

Darling with sweet whispers, oh how your vocie lingers.

i owe you more then this,

Much more then just these words i leave for you.

I will never be able to fix the pain, or hurt.

I let this go for far to long and im only to blame.

Im moved by everything you truly do.

And this stormed that has cassed never seems to pass.

We wont make it out, for im way to south.

I’ve drifted far to out.

and thing to keep you insane, never repeat my name.

For never will this be the same.

Im sorry i thought i could stay strong, but i was so very wrong.

I need you more each passing day, and each mintute is way too long.

i owe you way more then this song.

Repay you,

is what i can never do,

i will always be stuck debating,

if i should a still be waiting.

repay you,

with somthing other then bad news.

I wish you fought for my time,

That you really tried,

in trance of your heartfull lies.

Tongue Tied and wandering eyes,

Not ever were you mine.

Late Nights with strangers,

live it up while i lay to rest,

flirting with danger,

when i all i wanted was your best.

This is it, never want to see you walk through the door,

walk way, no more left for you to say,

And i just dont want you anymore.

Tongue Tied and wandering eyes,

Not ever were you mine.

Not many things bother me. I can take alot of people bull. But somthing that really grinds my gears is making someone feel like an outcast. As still being in highschool i see this happean often. Im never the victiom, but i dont stay quite about it.

so it just made me want to make a list of things that someone may bother them…with me.

When i sing the song you hate while you drive? How about when i play with pretty much every toy at target? When i put my headphones in while your speaking me? That i text “your a bitch” beacuse you responed in 1 word? That i wear leggings beacuse eyes tend to linger to my legs. My addiction to red heads? or When i watch movies i yell at the screen? That i read to pass the time till somthing better comes along? Maybe that i melt when i hear the name nick santino? When i stay up way to late with those kids you hate? That i can never be anywhere on time? perhaps its the way i sleep when im really tired? Falling asleep during a phone call? hang up on you? Is it that i look like im 12 not 17? That dance i do at soma? Maybe its just the fact that i just wrote a whole entry on things that may or may not bother you?..when you mite not even knwo who the hell i am

bothered yet??

I was asked today for advise on how to move on.

How to really forget someone. I thought about this all day. How someone once told me you cant stop loving someone..till you love someone more. But wouldnt that make that person some sort of rebound. Or how how even tho you move one, you cant really move on…How do you give up someone to someone else that never really tried as hard…What can you do when you knwo you have to let go…So i figured i write a little somthing in my friends eyes. The way she saw things.

…idk ill write somthing more up beat for 2mrrow!!

What well happean when you soon relize I do not belong to you anymore? How will you feel when he holds me, or the fact the he is the one that gives me a goodbye kiss? I do not mean to bring these things up, but it may soon happean. For why be so faithfull to somthing that never really gave back. I try. You Dont. I push. You Pull. You figured me out before the rest. Fixing things is what i always feel the need to do. You tryed to fix me once, i didnt really want it. You stuborn hardhead gentlemen stood your ground. You kept me from loseing myself to the world. So for that i feel the need to write you for your last chance. Your last call. The fact is you didnt pick up. Never called back. You had your 1st,2nd,3rd but i will not give you a 4th. Just know this is not easy to write, or think of. Truth of the matter is you know me, but i dont know you. Ive tryed but one step forward is a step backward. Your lack of trust is to blame. So i ask of you, dont call back, or try to reconnect. Text all you want but they will to be deleted and rejected. Maybe she can love you better then i can, the girl who dares to stand where i stood. But one thing is true…she will love you more then i ever could.

 Today, was what everyone needs. Its most of all what I need. My mind lately has been running away from me. A day full of music, friends, sneaking out, and laughs. I spent the day with thus far the sweetest boys to grace the face of this earth. They are in a band called A Love To Overcome..its in the works. But let me just say this..world be stoked!..BE VERY STOKED! Its not auto tune and syncs. Its a group of friends who relize the true meaning of music.AT ITS PURE. I have been inspired by them to write a shorty story…and here it is…hopefully you get it.

Guitar Chords and Goodbyes

     His breath relaxed when he took his place next to me. His warmth so strong reached me as we sat on the floor. The day seemed colder, it had an iery chill. We both knew today was on its way, we ignored the next month, the next week, and even the tomrrow. I guess I’m mostly to blame for that, i didnt want to lose him to it. He has in imagenitive soul, a pure heart, and a terrible addiction to a guitar. I guess the name musican is an understatment. Every new tab,lyric, and bridge revive him. It brings him happiness. Thats how i feel in love with him. Not his gorgeous brown eyes, not his soft vocie, not his whitty sarcasm. But the way he oh so gentle holds a guitar to make it make such a peacefull sound. To be able in a matter of hours write a song that shattered my walls, and opened his heart. He has a way to sneak sweet-talk into your ears, and leave it craving and aching for more. He is what music is set out to be. Someone who lives to share experiences,love,pain,and hope, with melodies and chorus. Music is his true love. He cripples under its grips. He rises to it’s name. He is meant to travel air,land and sea to spread his passion, his calling. I cant keep him. When somthing much more has claimed him. So as he sits next to me for one very last time, he is still mine. My dearest memories belong to him. Always true and never unfaithfull. As we sit and watch the sun slowly retire for today, he already seems distant. I know his love is true, but his love for music is faith. He will leave tommrrow and travel the states. So tonight I lose him to music. I do not want to be the reason he stays. I will not rob you the chance to hear his blessing. I give him up. For i will always be here, but this opportunity will not. So as darkness unfolds, and the stars arise. I say goodnight and goodybe.

p.s sorry if there alot of spelling errors…its was just a quick short story.

Califorina is sad on rainny days. It doesnt seem to shine as bright as it does when the sun is up in the sky lighting everything on fire. It seems like the blues are not as blues and the green are not just the right green. The smiles of the toddlers feeling the warmth wrapping around there not so grown minds and bodies. It is just the comfort a Califorinan feels when the sun is leading the day…with a engery of light. When the clouds unfold and the cold sneaks in it makes days seem long and not as alive. The way the sun sets and rises…never lets you doubt it..its faithfull, never changes,never goes away. But rain clouds play games, shower here, snow there,and when you think it passed..it pours! Its true were use to the good life. The sun is why we live here, what wakes our lazy asses in the morning, it keeps us warm after a unplanned beach trip, it keeps us tan…and most of all it gets us out, it makes us want more. We could stay inside, watch a movie, set and wait. But no with this cali sun you would be crazy to waste a day inside and do nothing. So as the rainy days curse this week..ill stay warm with the thought of the sun that gets overcomed by clouds.

tired and uninspired

Home, was always quiet ‘til the sun went down.
But we were stowaways.
Yeah, we were so afraid.

So, we ran out of town.
From everyone who was calling us out.
Relax, relax.
Exhale and breathe, just breathe for me.

You are the earth beneath my feet,
You are my gravity.
Cause lately I’ve been tired and uninspired.
Cause lately I’ve been tired, oh-so tired.

Oh, they’re not flame,
Oh, it went away.
You knew you had to leave and couldn’t stay.
Be strong for me, I’ll be strong for you.
Be strong for me, I’ll be strong for you.

You are the earth beneath my feet,
You are my gravity.
Cause lately I’ve been tired and uninspired.
Cause lately I’ve been tired, oh-so tired.

And be strong for me.
And be strong for me.
And I’ll be strong for you, oh, you.

You are the earth beneath my feet,
You are my gravity.
Cause lately I’ve been tired and uninspired.
Cause lately I’ve been tired and uninspired.

You are the earth beneath my feet,
You are my gravity.
You are the earth beneath my feet.
You are my gravity.

Cause lately I’ve been tired and uninspired.
Cause lately I’ve been tired, oh-so tired.

So i just thought it would be nice to write a short story…It doesnt really have to do with me or anything. Its just a plot i thought id try to explore. I was influnced by Ghostgirl and The Almost song Hands..its kind of a not afraid to belive in things people never really care for…mostly a lost cause sorta thing..but not really

<3

The Fortunate

Often times in school, most of the times high school, what everyone is searching for is love. Young, naive, crazy, reckless love. Its not a fairytale, its not a love song. Young love is somthing that grows from faith and pure heartfullness. For Amy Luiz it was much more more then that. She never really knew what love was, here parents were still together but were only with eachother to avoid lonleyness. Amy knew she wasnt going to fall in love with a vaimpre or the big man on campus. She never expected to be the secert girl the captain of the football team would fall for. She knew much better then old 80s movie plots. Tho, she did beilve in the love that she would fell that musicans spoke of in love songs. Amy inriched herself in very chours, bridge and melody that came with heartreching, addictable love songs. She knew the love they spoke of and poured there hearts about… was real. It wasnt the easy and it wasnt planned. It was the type of love that you have to be fearless with, never afraid to risk it all for, and fall flat on your face. The kind that could one day leave you with a feeling of emptyness that haunts your every move. Yet, Amy hoped and waited for such pure love. Its out there. She knew it was just like Death unexpected and very sneaky. No matter what hatred, evil, and nasty things she saw in the world. The one thing, the one thing so strong and pure that kept things sane was love. Young Amy Luiz beileved in love.

So first post is about it being its my first post…STOKED ABOUT IT!!…okay not really. But i im fully comited to this little thing i like to call…blog. If you want to call it lameness then so be it. But i well just posting things that are THE REAL LIFE of me. Its what i feel, music i dance in my room to, things in my head, pictures of whatever i feel like…and just well…things that i want to show who ever is reading this a little bit of me…tho u are a complete stranger…and idk who you are…YES IT IS VERY WEIRD!!..but hey life is weird..thats what makes it a little fun.

-Cali